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Can Red Hots Change Your Life?
A whole new world opened before me when I read my first explicit erotic romance. A world were the “s” word was no longer locked in a closet and hidden, as if sex was a horrible act that would leave you tarred, feathered and ridden out of town on a rail if the neighbors found out you did “it”.
I’ve always been a voracious reader. I’ll read anything from the back of the toilet paper packages to huge volumes of philosophy. I read to learn—okay, so I didn’t learn anything from the toilet paper packages, but the cereal boxes … I read to escape into adventure and excitement. I read to expand the possibilities of my life. My philosophy is there isn’t anything not worth reading. Doesn’t mean I agree or am enlightened, just means I shelve the material for future consideration.
My first adventure into erotic romance opened doors to thoughts I had always shoved down and kept hidden. I had that “ah-ha!” moment. If so many people wrote about all those luscious feelings, then more people than just me must feel them! I must be
Okay, so sometimes I’m a bit slow. Blame it on generational dogma.
After inhaling around 100 erotic romances in a month, I began think about the written word and the effect authors have on the world. There was a time when HG Wells wrote about landing on the moon and he was laughed at because it wasn’t possible. Jules Verne sent us deep beneath the ocean, but we all knew it was just fantasy.
Then came the historic moment when we watched as Neil Armstrong took the first steps for mankind on the moon. A time came when we actually explored the dark, cold depths of the ocean, even if Captain Nemo is still a mystery.
Shakespeare said, “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in our philosophy.” But I often wonder if our philosophy is broadened by our dreams of yearning for things beyond our experience.
From reading erotic romance, I developed a thesis for my life: If I can imagine it, then beyond all probability, perhaps I can achieve it. And if that is true, then could happily ever after be attainable for me?
I put my thesis into action and changed my life. I went from an unfulfilling relationship barren of any type of intimacy to one filled with intense intimacy in every aspect—physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.
Why? Because I picked up a red hot erotic romance and it opened my eyes to possibilities I’d never imagined.
How about you? Am I the only one whose life has changed dramatically since we opened the doors and let the light shine on the “s” word?
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Awesome post, TK. You had me with your thesis. :-)
Thank you, Linda! It does make you sit back and think, doesn’t it? Thanks for dropping by!
Hi Teri! Not sure what to say but i did show up. lol
great subject today.
Jodi
Thanks, Jodi! You knew exactly what to say—it was a good subject!
Erotica/romantica books helped me to discover certain things about myself. I found after reading certain types of erotica stories that my libido reacted more strongly then with other genres of erotica.
This helped me to learn more about my sexual preferences. I just wished that this type of writing had been more popular when I was in my twenties. It would have been beneficial to my sex life then.
I was quite shy back then and didn’t know how to communicate what I needed to sexually simulate me. With these types of stories, I learned what would arouse me.
I feel woman could actual use these stories as a tool to better understand their sexual likes and to help them communicate with their partners what those desires are.
Thanks for the topic Teri and allowing us to voice our opinions.
Candy
I think you are right—women could use these stories to better understand their likes and dislikes, and men could use them to better understand women. As a couple, if a woman is unable to ask or talk about her needs, pehaps she could pick a book and leave it for her S/O to read, or even read it together. Thanks for stopping by, Candy!
Honestly, I’ve loosened up a lot since I started reading – and writing – erotic romance. My husband is thrilled :)
Great post!
Natasha
Thank you, Natasha! Funny how it works, isn’t it? We read and/or write it, and then it just seems … easier or better!
Thanks so much for your comment!
I’m getting in a little late on your post, but I have to agree 100% with you. And I’m right there with the generational dogma. I’ve only been reading erotic romance for about a year now and been writing it for the last six months or so. I know I’ve discovered things about myself that I always knew but tried to ignore. I also know that although my husband is thrilled to be the receipant of my new found sexuality, I still found myself having a hard time telling my family (especially my grandmother) about being published. My fear/embarrassment/concern…whatever you called it was solely based on my upbringing. It’s amazing how years of brainwashing can still infiltrate your common sense, even when you know its wrong. Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know I’m not alone!