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The Princess of Procrastination
It’s 4 a.m. do you know where your author is? Well, this one’s blogging, but through the magic of the delay button, it’s not gonna show up until three p.m. At least, I’m prayin’ this thing works with the fervor of an inmate on death row waiting for that important phone call from the governor.
The quote by screenwriter, Paul Rudnick is essentially me. I have to be alone to do my magic, shabby as it is.
“As a writer, I need an enormous amount of time alone. Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials. It’s a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing, until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write. Having anybody watching that or attempting to share it with me would be grisly.” ~Paul Rudnick
The television’s too loud, and my husband yells out the coming attractions to the room at large. The cat comes in and out of my room incessantly and thinks a closed door is a crime against nature. And by all that is holy, whoever bought the dog that squeaky toy is going to the be hanged from the highest tree at dawn. Wait, that was me. Never mind.
My daughter is the least of my troubles because at seventeen, she’d rather be as far from the house as possible. However, this brings on a whole new set of distractions.
Where is she? Why isn’t she home? Is she out running the roads or worse, lying dead in a ditch? Hold on now, it’s not me doing all that worrying. Nay, nay! It’s my hubby, but instead of calling her, he goes into his Daddy of Dread routine, turns into the Prince of Paranoia, the… okay, I’m out of alliterative phrases, but it’s irritating in the extreme, so much so that he’s the one in real danger of turning up dead in a ditch!
So, how to block all these little distractions out and stop the procrastination to write the stories that buzz angrily in the back of the brain? Short of murder, we can do like Mr. Rudnick says, wait until the house is quiet and get started making that magic.
Many authors, me included are a lot like vampires. We crave darkness, only truly coming to life late at night. Of course, we don’t drink blood, our species is more symbiotic than a parasitic. The relationship we forge with our characters can be violent, bloody, and chaotic. Sort of like one of my family reunions after they’ve tapped the keg.
However, a vampire author shares his or her very essence with their characters, shoving it out through their fingertips onto the page. Many authors channel their emotions are channel through their characters. A lot of these are very dark indeed and it’s hard to bring them out in the light of day in front of family, not to mention the dog. The cat would just sneer. Some books beg to be written in the middle of the night when all is quiet.
Solitude is an author’s best friend because silence allows the thoughts to settle in and stick. Writing is a hard business, at least for me. I’ll let easier things like the television, IM’s, and email distract me until the night’s been frittered away. My characters are growing impatient, the sound of them stomping in my head is growing louder as I type, soon it’ll be too loud for even me the Queen of Denial to ignore. That’s why I’m up at four in the morning writing. That and Brimstone Babe is really scary. I wonder if she’s a vamp? Naah. She’s too cute.
I can relate Jenna! Case in point, I am on here blogging instead of printing out my draft and beginning the scary, scary rewriting process I told myself I’d begin 3 days ago. So many other things to do though. Taxes, emails, feed the dogs, feed the husband, teach Miss Two the difference between something we should pick up and show mummy and something we shouldn’t (an incident with a mysterious dead bug only moments ago inspired this last point).
But at night that pesky need for sleep tends to rear it’s ugly head for me. Not much productivity there either. Hmm. Might have to try it though.
Cheers,
Sami
I’m addicted to coffee. Pro: Keeps me up all night. Con: Keeps me umm.. up all night. LOL!
I crave solitude too. If only that solitude would come in the morning when my eyes aren’t so tired!
Since I work days that’s not an option for me. On the other hand, I can say this, Ze writer of ze night, what beeyootiful prose she writes. Bwhahahha! (coughs) Yeah, I’ve been savin’ that one up for a while.
It’s 8:34pm here in Oz and what am I doing? Reading this blog and doing washing. I seem to do my best writing at between 5:30am and 8:00am. Then off to work. Sigh.
I used to write at night due to the dreaded day job, but now if I don’t get started and well into it before noon, the rest of the day is a waste. Because? It’s the new fall TV season and I have to decide if any of the new offerings are worth my viewing time. I have only come across one Moonlight, but I know Women’s Murder Club, which doesn’t debut until next week, has my name on it.
I write in the morning before my brain has too much time to consider other options. :-)
Jenna, I work days too. I just WISH I could have my mornings to write :)
I know, it’s sad. I need to win the lotto so I can form a writer commune with my friend Meme. We’ve got it all plotted out. Of course, then we’d have the hubby burning things down probs. Her hubby, not mine. This would make great fodder for our books though, hmm, that’s it, I’m buying a ticket this week.
This reminds me of a conversation I had with my DH. He didn’t understand that even when he sees me sitting alone in our bedroom without my computer in front of me and the TV is off and the white noise machine is on, that I AM writing.
:-)
great post Jenna – I’m an accomplished procrastinator too so I know exactly how you (and Paul Rudnick) feel!
It’s true, when nobody else is awake, the story begins to flow. Maybe I should dose their iced tea with sleeping pills. Nah, 5 to 10 would look bad on my resume`. So glad I’m not alone though!
I don’t procrastinate. I mariniate in life experience during the day. Then in the middle of the night when I have enough hours to myself to sort the input and filter it through the labyrinth of my creativity, I place it on the page for others to enjoy.
Sounds more proactive when you state it that way ;)
~X
Sounds like BS to me but writers are champion shovelers of the old meadow muffins. We use this all natural product so our books will be bigger, longer and uncut, wait, no that’s South Park. I meant our works grow like flowers, in the fullness of time. (Tries to look smart, and in no way like Cartman)
Anyway, I love how you put that, so the next time hubby asks me what I’m doing in here, I’ll yell out loud and proud, Marinating!!